Monday, January 18, 2010

Kitten Update

Little Elvis is still with us you'll be overjoyed to hear. Elvis is as ridiculous as his father used to be before the latter became a fat slob, not to mince words, who now just lies slumped against the radiator waiting for the next lot of food to be served up to him - it's pathetic... (honestly, he used to be The Funny One, and you'd think he'd be even funnier now as being large naturally makes you funny, but no). Elvis particularly likes walnuts, kicking them around the floor like some demented Paul Gascoigne. We thought he'd be the clever, gifted type. We expose him to all the right influences: we've read him all the classics, Jane Austin, Danielle Steele; we play Mozart to him when he's falling asleep; we've even taken him to the ballet and The Horse of the Year Show, what a mistake that was - he's now jumping about over all the furniture trying to beat his "personal best". Nothing helps. He's more like the cheeky, muddy shirted football kid of those washing powder commercials. We're thrown away the brochures we got from Kitten Acedemy and St. Mogs and have inquired at the local college about courses in plumbing. Really, I don't know where he gets it from.



No such problem with Mitzi. She's gone. She was a lovely kitten, honestly, she had her own little personality, but well, she was just so quiet - we never knew what she was thinking. Mrs Dilo was talking with the lady in the cat food shop and happened to let it drop that we had a kitten that we'd really to give a better start in life to. A man then telephoned us. He came round. He was a young and very tall Moroccan medical student. We asked if he had a basket with him; he said he hadn't but grinned and said he could carry her home in his rucksack. We weren't worried, no, certainly not because he was Moroccan: legend has it that tabby cats (like Mitzi) have the distinctive M on their foreheads because of a blessing from the prophet Mohammed, whose name begins with "M", errr, in the Latin alphabet. The student bit worried me slightly, and scenes from that ghastly The Young Ones programme filled my fretful dreams that night; then there's the medical student bit..... but sometimes one simply just has to say "out of sight out of mind". I'm sure she's in a better place.

13 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

That's the un-cutest picture of a kitten I've ever seen. He looks like a furry rodent carrying the plague.

Pearl said...

Hadn't thought of The Young Ones for quite some time!

"St. Mogs". Believe it or not, I feel very bilingual right now, just knowing that "mogs" means "kitty". :-D Yay, me!

Pearl

Lulu LaBonne said...

Glad Elvis is thriving - and playing with your nuts

Gadjo Dilo said...

Bananas, he does get a bit rodenty when he's chasing the walnuts, but he'll thank you not to accuse him of carrying the plague :-)

Pearly, I hadn't either, and I'm pleased to hear that it made it to your part of the world. Consider yourself D-yayed!

Lulu, he is and he is. We miss Mitzi too, but the lady in the shop says she knows the student and he's taking very good care of her.

Gyppo Byard said...

Had I a picture of the world's most evil kitten, who I misguidedly hand-reared after discovering it shivering on my doorstep in 1997, I would share it with you. After its misbehaviour grew too much for us, we gave it to our neighbour's 10-year old son, who desperately wanted a pet.

The neighbour gave it back again three days later after it bit the boy, shat on his bed and clawed a guest's leg to shrebbons.

Never trust a cat. Just don't.

Alice Scradcza said...

There is an old Lithuanian saying: "You can't weld a cat to a dog!" It means different metals really - I don't think you can weld a cat to anything.

Gadjo Dilo said...

Gyppo, ahhh, poor lickle puddy cat, he was only twying to be fwiendly!! You should have sent it over here, we run a tight regime involving cold showers and 10 mile yomps every morning that would soon have taught it some respect.

Alice, the Lithuanians have a saying for everything, and I like them, even though they're mostly about welding techniques. (Weld a cat to a dog, indeed - more a truism< than a saying...)

Camilla Jessop said...

In a world of ambivalence and cruelty to animals, I have always felt that a man is not a man unless he loves pussies.

相處 said...

Many a true word is spoken in jest...................................................

Scarlet Blue said...

You have bigger walnuts over there.
Have you tried Elvis with a pencil yet?
Sx

Gadjo Dilo said...

Camilla, that's as true now as it's ever been!

相處, can't argue with that either.

Scarley, we do indeed have bigger walnuts, though of course it's not the size that counts but what you do with them.... (Pencil? Please do elaborate!)

Kevin Musgrove said...

Oh Scarlet!!!

They only look like pencil sharpeners!

Gadjo Dilo said...

Kevin, ahhhhhhh, ok, I understand. I see that you and Scarlet understand each other very well!